Toxic
by crazyforcuddles
Summary: After a traumatic event Emily is left spiralling out of control. She's so far gone that nothing matters to her any more including her own future.


Emily POV

I shouldn't be here, I really really shouldn't be here, the room is filled with alcohol and the smell of weed is just intoxicating and most likely it's what I smell like now, every bone in my body tells me to run but I can't run, not when I've already gotten so far, I might as well get it over with. My clothes are baggy and unflattering, my dark hair is blocking most of my face and just for extra measure I have a fitted base ball hat on but even with my diguse I know she'll be able to find me in this crowd. I really shouldn't be here. Maya would be so disappointed in me but I can't think of that right now, right now all I have to do is stick to the plan:get in and get out. No small talk, just business. It was harder to find her this time, she's usually surrounded by a bunch of guys with just basking in the attention but this time I'm surprised to find her alone, she sitting in the kitchen with a red cup in her hand, her short blue dress is clinging to her every curve and her blond locks are in perfect curls and a few strands fall over her face as she keeps looking down at her phone completely oblivious to everything around her.

"Alison " I make my voice a little deeper than it has to be just in case someone recognised my voice. I know I'm being paranoid but we've never met in public before and I'm not exactly sure how to act.

"Well if it isn't my mermaid" She's smirking at me like the devil she is. She know i hate that nick name but she just does to piss me off and to just mock she steps closer to me I flinch and without realising it i tale a step back. She did not like that. I towered over her but those icy blue eyes always made me feel like I was an ant at the bottom of her shoe. I could see her mood instantly change towards me at my reaction .

"I just came to get a little more...I...I need it "

"follow me" she was back to smirking and no matter how unnerving it was I still reluctantly followed her upstairs to an empty room, she locked the door behind me and through herself onto the bed with her dress ridding almost all the way up. I quickly pulled out the crumbled notes and handed it to her. I stood nervously at the end of the bed as I watched her count the money. It didn't take her long but when she was done she smirked in a way that gave me chills.

"Your short"

"What are you talking about its all there " I counted and re - counted before hand.

"interest baby"

No this couldn't happeninging! I need it now!

"Alison please" I pleaded but she wasn't even phased by it. In fact she pulled her dress all the way up and spreed her legs unashamed at the lack of underwear. Her folds were already glistening and I couldn't look away.

"Your Toby ' s girlfriend "

"Never stopped you before"

" please"

"Fields shut your mouth and get over here!" She only ever yells when she means business but I guess I didn't move fast enough because she grabbed me and thorough me on the bed roughly and I yelped as she started tugging on my sweat pants. I struggle a little to stay in place and for a while I think I might get away that is before she spanks my ass so hard I yelp and I'm sure it's going to be red later .

"if you dont behave im going to have to start cutting you off. Mona's been looking really hot lately"

I help her get me undressed because even though I hate to admit it she gets me turned on. When im with her like this i don't feel so empty. I actually feel alive. "spread them thighs for me"I complie instantly and I don't even pretend she can't see how wet I am.

"good girl " she starts to lick me on my most intermite place. She starts off slow building me up before plunging two fingers into me without warning and when I yelp out she just spanks me on my wet centre making me jump forward and into her mouth. She's so rough, she keeps pounding into me like she was trying to spilt me open, I don't know how she does it but I feel myself hit the headboard harder she gets and I love it.

"Oh you like that! " I don't speak but my moans are answer enough.

"Say it!" I still don't answer her so she spanks my ass hard.

"Yes!" one last thrust and I'm coming in shock waves. My whole body is shaking but she doesn't care because she goes back to licking me.

"No more" she doesn't listen and soon I'm sqourting all over her face. I didn't even know that was possible.

She crawls up my body till her breasts are touching mine and we're face to face.

"clean your mess" I'm still breathless but I lick her face clean anyway and when she's satisfied she pulls her dress into place leaves the room with me still dazed and confused. I don't know how long she's gone for but

when she comes back she goes straight to the money on the night stand, she counts it one more time before pulling out a package from her bra and my eyes light up at the white powder. I grab it the moment she throws it on the bed , its way more than I can afford.

"You can pay me back next time " she smiles "but for now I suggest you get the hell out since you just ruined Jason's bed." I jump up and sure enough there was a big wet stain on the cover. Alison didn't even look at me before she left. It's always the same with her, just a hump and dump. There times when I think she's pure evil but there are also those rare moments that I swear she was human. While I begin to snort the cocaine I feel the same way this always makes me feel...over the moon, like nothing can touch me, i feel super human but i know this wont last because when it wears off i'll be back to feeling like complete crap and yet just a few months ago my life was perfect.

...

 _"Come on baby,one more time,please "Maya pouted at me while batting her long eye lashes in a way that I found so irresistibly cute but I would never tell her that,her ego was already big enough. I pretended to think it over but we both knew I couldn't resist those lips. So kneeled over and kissed pout._

 _"You know one of these days that pout isn't gonna work then I'ma have no problem dumping your ass "Maya scowled at me then through a pillow at my head which I easily ducked._

 _" Psh! just face it babe . You looovee meee"she sang then stuck her tongue out at me making me role my brown eyes but the smile never left my lips as I heald her hand in mine and studied her parm tracings the lines on her tan skin. "This one here,means your going to live a long life " I traced the line than went to the next one."And this means your rebellious but of course we already knew that " I chuckled but when i looked up her eyes instantly locked with mine and my breath hitched at how intense her eyes were. Maya always had this thing about her eyes that completely hypnotised me, it was like one of those moments were everything else just faded into the background and she's all that mattered."Keep going "She encouraged but with the way she was looking at me right now I didn't think I could look away and I'm so glad I didn't because she kneeled over and kissed me so softy that if it wasn't for how fast my heart was racing and the heat on my lips I would have thought I'd imagined it._

 _"I love you Emily Fields, so so much,and no one will ever compare to you. Your -"_

 _"Your my forever "i completed before pulling her close to me in an intense kiss that had her fingers tangled in my hair and my heart racing. This moment was-_

 _"Maya hunny! "At the sound of Mrs St . Germans voice we instantly pulled apart and I moved as far away from her as possible as her moms footsteps echoed down the basement steps. The closer she got the more nervous I became,. It wasn't that I didn't love her mother or that she didn't love me it was just the fact that after a year of sneaking around she didn't know that her daughter and I were in love or that either of us liked girls._

 _"Oh Emily, I didn't know you were here "_

 _" Hey Mrs St. Germain "_

 _"Emily now you know just to call me Nichol "_

 _"So Nichol can I spend the night over at Emily's "I pinched Maya's shoulder at her rudeness even though her mom didn't really seam to mind._

 _"I don't know oh dear daughter of mine " Nichol sighed dramatically. "It is a school night. "She mused loudly. "Oh what to do what to do " She picked up the basket of dirty clothes with a heavy sigh and Maya just groaned loudly at her mom while I held back my smile. The women were known for their dramatics especially Nichol._

 _"Fine, I will do the laundry "_

 _"Oh you don't have to "Nichol insisted with a bright smile but still gladly handed over the basket to Maya who rolled her eyes. "Now can I go"_

 _"I never said you couldn't "Nichol smirked and Maya huffed as she grabbed the basket and marched up the stairs._

 _"Love you! Take care of my baby Emily but don't let her push you around! "Nichol yelled after us and the last sound I heard before Maya slammed the door was the sound of the Tv going on to one of her mothers favourite TV shows._

 _"She is so lazy "_

 _"And you're not miss -I can't -do - my-own-homework " i mocked but just bumped her shoulder against mine. Maya was so lazy, I once saw her watch hours of the shopping network just because she couldn't find the remote control to change the channel. but even with all her laziness and more attitude than I knew how to handle Maya was more than the love of my life, she was my world._

 _..._

I shook my head at the memories and wiped a tear that I was sure was there. I couldn't think about that , I couldn't remember her, I needed to forget. I needed to erase every kiss, every touch, every whispered 'I love you' I didn't deserve any it, I never deserved her.


End file.
